In Your Element

When did you last feel like you were really ‘in your element?’ For me, it was this weekend: I had taken the rare opportunity to go away with friends for the weekend and, walking in the Dorset countryside with the sun shining and great views all around, I felt that wonderful feeling when you are with great friends, enjoying life, the fresh air and the magic of the outdoors on a sunny day.  

I came back to work on Monday with a renewed sense of purpose, raring to go for the week ahead (which I must admit is not always the case!) Of course, feeding emotional relationships, connections with friends and experiencing a sense of flow are all key tenets of positive psychology so perhaps it is no surprise that I felt the way I did.  

But while doing some leadership training with our support staff Heads of Department, I was reminded of the potential connection between positive wellbeing and good leadership. This is not new I realise, and may well be an obvious link to many readers, but much like some of our students I am an ‘experiential learner’ rather than a purely theoretical being! Getting to know better colleagues I don't work with so often and facilitating connections between them gave me a real sense of meaning in my work as well as a sense or flow. The tenets of good leadership and positive wellbeing could not have been clearer to me at that point nor as well-linked in my mind.  

This got me thinking. Is good leadership always linked to good well-being? Our leadership approach at Alleyn's is called ‘Make a Difference’ and is based around three pillars: knowing yourself better, making strong connections with your team and with others, and seeking and developing meaning and purpose in the things that you do. The first group at School to experience training in this approach were our current School Prefects and they certainly brought a refreshing energy, altruism and a can do attitude to the course, as well as a total lack of cynicism. Watching them enthusiastically complete their flipcharts on “what would be missing if they didn’t exist as a group” – at 9pm on a Friday evening in Surrey, I might add! – was most definitely a stand out moment for me as a teacher. 

And so, returning to my original question: do all good leaders experience positive well-being? Casting my mind back through our recent national leaders gave me few clues as well as sending a few shivers down my spine so I firmly closed that door and thought about some leaders closer to home! As Head of Sixth Form, I have worked with some brilliant student leaders over the past eight years and this gave me some good, if rather circumstantial, evidence for a link. However, in formulating our ‘Make a Difference’ approach, I have had the good fortune to read some insightful and engaging work on leadership philosophy as well as a decent amount of positive psychology too in support of our collective efforts to foster greater well-being amongst the students. And the same key themes shine through: if you want to ‘live in your element’, get to know yourself well, understand your strengths and what's important to you, build connections with others, and seek meaning and purpose in what you do. 

While travelling back from Dorset, and feeling the positive energy ebb slowly away as London approached, I desperately tried to bottle the feelings of connection and meaning that I had experienced over the weekend. And for what it's worth, here's what I came up with (whilst travelling through some roadworks on the M3) by way of ‘top tips’:  

• When and where do you currently live in your element? List all the activities you do where your strengths and values come together? 
• If you’re not sure what your strengths are, you could start with the VIA character strengths survey to help find out. 
• If you’re not sure what’s important to you, find out what your values really are. The chapter “Living into our values” in Brené Brown’s ‘dare to lead’ (Vermillion, 2018) is as good a place to start as any; 
• Finally, think about where and how you can combine your strengths, values and passions going forward.  

Here's to life in your element; long may it continue!